12/01/2008
ruled out
i am in a state of confusion. i am neither here nor there, i dont even know where i am supposed to be...but i do not have the slightest care. this is the age of "supposed" security and i am still wading unchartered waters. being accustomed to flying and disappearing... i actually think this time its different. not sure exactly why but maybe the restraint (being the unfathomable force that is the you-know-who) is the defying factor.
understandable actually, my heart has been in constant trauma for as long as i remember. it still beats though (barely detectable by a stethoscope). id like to actually congratulate myself for being the ultimate survivor. with all honesty... i am tired of sprinting. i want to stay but i do not think i am capable of it...
the rules in "this", this meaning...gad i cant even define "it". the major rule is to "expect the unexpected" which isnt even a rule per se... its more of a word of warning. intense, reckless, irresponsible, exciting... makes you pump every ounce of adrenaline..always uphill. the sad thing is the possible crash. i predict total wreckage. devastation and probably a very, very fatal casualty.
morbid and pessimistic thoughts creep into the otherwise legal-aged-wonderland... but who knows? maybe...just maybe... eternal sunshine might be possible.
posted by b3Rn1cE @ 8:09 PM |
